I never really thought about what I would feel when I became a vegan; I never expected the tears or the heart-wrenching sadness. But here I am today with a year’s worth of experience and imagery that has scattered my mind. I’ve seen so many faces that at this moment have already ceased to exist along with their cries that echo within the cavern of my chest, leaving my heart hollowed out. I’ve felt the sting of tears that have left my eyes raw. Who knew that such crimson colored flesh and feathers could cause me to scream internally at the world some nights that I toss and turn.
Over the past year of deciding to live in compassion as much as I knew possible, I’ve seen minds change and traditions die. I’ve seen living creatures suffer under the wrath of human hands more than a thousand times. There are days where I sit in bed and just stare blankly at a screen, wondering about how they feel on that side staring into the lens of a camera. There are times where I’m so overwhelmed by the situations that I sink into my carpet and weep, but overall of these feelings of desperation, there are days of hope.
I’ve come to realize that past all the destruction and hatred and inhumane practices; there is a world filled beyond the horizon with beauty and love. If anything matters in this world, it’s to spread love, to share the truth, and to share hope. God has given me such opportunity to create relationships with people, to teach them about compassion and to show and receive love. I’ve had days where anxiety takes over my body, but I’ve also had days where I’m convinced there has been a path laid before us by his hands. I’ve learned to not fret about the darkness here today, but continue to remain faithful and seek out the light for the future; the light that I’m confident will shine down upon each living creature, warming their hearts and mending their scars. Being a vegan comes with the hardship of knowing, but it also comes with this beautiful understanding of others hearts.
I have realized-especially in the past few months that I am called to share love, to spread the word, to spread compassion on all levels of species. I have tried to take a different route towards spreading veganism simply because I loathed surrounding myself with hatred and letting it deep into my words. So here I am today, someone who wants to use the construction of sentences to convey the feelings I have inside, the events I’ve seen, and the emotions I’ve felt. There will be a change in my writing because there has been a transformation in me, a new result in my head. I’ve come to realize that the world needs more than just another girl spreading veganism through social media and I hope that makes sense to you more than it does to me. I want to share love, help people grow in all aspects of their lives. I want to see the potential in people come out and I want to envision a day where the light of tomorrow peacefully awakens all creatures. My goal isn’t honestly just veganism anymore, and hopefully, that can come out in my words more than it has in the past. If any of this makes sense, then I am glad because most of these thoughts are like a pile of loose yarn inside my head that I’m trying to unravel and completely understand to explain. But that’s what this is about; it is a journey that includes all minds and hearts alike.